Christmas
by Eireka
Summary: Akihiko spends his Christmas remembering.   Akihiko/F!Protagonist  SPOILERS FOR MARCH 4/5


A/N: Ok well so here is my 2nd completed attempt at fanfiction! ^^ I'm very happy about this one because it was the first time the infamous plot bunny wouldn't let go and I'm so glad it didn't 33

Disclaimer: I don't own Persona 3 :'(

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><p>It was a cold snowy winter night. The Tokyo streets were lit up with festive lights and Christmas decorations overflowed the area.<p>

It was beautiful, it was something _she_ would have liked.

Akihiko imagined her face when they went to Paulownia Mall for their first Christmas. Her eyes lit up with such joy and excitement, and she had the biggest smile on her face as they walked around the mall viewing all the decorations.

But that was 10 years ago.

Today, on December 24, 2020, Akihiko Sanada wasn't at the mall or even in the busy city streets enjoying the Christmas atmosphere among the crowds.

No Akihiko Sanada was in his small, sparsely furnished apartment, the only light coming from a small candle on the dining room table and the glittering lights of the Tokyo streets from the window.

Turning away from his spot at the window, he moves to the table and gazes at the wooden music box resting upon it. He opens it up and peruses over the contents: a gold bracelet, a silver ring, and some other well cared for pieces of jewelry.

" I got this for you, I thought you'd like them."

There's no answer. He doesn't expect one.

He quietly put the new glimmering ruby earrings in the box.

"Merry Christmas."

He can imagine the way she would smile if she got the earrings. That warm, loving, affectionate smile she reserved only for him.

He sits at the table, and buries his face in his hands. He can still remember everything about her: her eyes, her smile, her laughter, her scent, her touch.

He still thinks a lot about that Christmas day.

The way she looked at everything as they walked around the mall, the way she laughed at some of the sillier displays, the way she held his hand as he pulled her from display to display, the way she looked at him- so _full_ of affection as he (nervously) gave her the music box, the way she looked after he fed her one of the sweet fries she had given him, the slight blush that crept up her cheeks as she asked if she could sit closer.

But, most of all, her remembers what happened after he invited her to his room that night.

It was the _**first **_time they _**ever...**_

It was the first time_** she ever...**_

It was the first _**he**_ _**ever...**_

He used to always think of that day, whenever things got tough, whenever it seemed the would lose their fight against Nyx.

But now those memories _**burn **_him when they come, the memory of her hand in his freezes his fingers to the point where they become _**numb**_, and the thought of her lips brings up a lump in his throat and he feels like he's choking _and_ _he's not sure if that would be a __**bad**__ thing because if he dies then he might just be able to __**see her **__again._

And so every Christmas Akihiko Sanada doesn't go out with friends or co-workers or spend time walking around the streets enjoying the decorations that have been put up. No, he stays home alone and remembers _**that**_ Christmas.

And then he counts.

"10 pieces of jewelry, one for each year I loved you."

_And he doesn't feel right saying **love**__**d**__ because he still __**loves **__her and the choking feeling is back and he welcomes it like a long lost friend..._

And then when the feeling passes and her realizes he's still here and she's _**still gone:**_

Akihiko Sanada counts again: _"3588 tears, one for each day I wash I could see you again."_

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><p>AN: As I started writing this I realized that, while I have a lot of writing ideas, the ones I write best are all angsty :( Not that it's exactly a _bad_ thing, but hopefully I can learn to write happier fics XD

And yes, I actually calculated how many days passed from March 5, 2010 to December 24, 2020. I'm THAT crazy XP that's including leap years people.

So now that's done, REVIEW PLEASE! Constructive criticism is appreciated~

Flames will be used to make SMORES 3


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